Is Anyone Listening?
This book also reveals rules and insights that guide you in communicating more successfully with your partner, as well as with friends, family members, and even strangers. The essence of this book's communication program involves learning how to feel genuine interest, as well as compassion, without being judgmental or reactive.
Among the questions addressed and answered are: Do we really listen to our partner, or do we just want to express what we think and feel? Are you truly interested in what others have to say, or are you caught up in your own emotional reactions? Do you really care how others see things, or do you just want them to see things your way?
A major part of this book deals with the problem of unconscious self-centeredness, and it shows how this common mentality impedes communication and blocks intimacy. We find it much easier to see the self-centeredness of others than to see our own, because becoming aware of our own contradicts our idealized image. The more self-centered we are, the more likely we will deny being self-centered.
The book also addresses the challenge of confronting others and the need to be honest about how we feel. Sometimes we're not certain just what we're feeling, and other times we're afraid to express our feelings directly. Such feelings can be associated with shame and being seen as a failure. We might also expect to be blamed for what we feel. This book helps us to overcome our fears of our partner's possible negative reactions and teaches us how to resolve fights.